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The Brass Tacks: Fashion Faux Pas0
By - Posted 4th July, 2015 at 9:10 pm

I’m a very blunt person.  I tell it like it is, even if no one wants to hear it.  Let’s face it– It’s just no fun any other way!

Now sugar-coating things is alright for a little while, it helps make the bitterness of the truth seem a lot less bad than it already is, but unfortunately the sugar sweetness wears away every time, and that makes things even worse. So I’m here to say the things that people don’t want to when you’re around.  Cover your ears; it’s time to get down to brass tacks.

I’d like to start this article by giving a simple message to the youth of the world: Choose your clothes wisely. Our clothes are our signature, our stamp, our insignia, whatever you would like to call it. We can sport any type of clothing that we want; it’s a free world and I dig it guys!  But this freedom is one that we should use and not abuse.  If you walk around in clothes that are relatively hideous, people will assume that you are a relatively hideous person. Please keep in mind that the human race is quite judgmental.  Don’t try to say otherwise,  I know that when you see that girl  who isn’t exactly a size 2 strutting down the street in skin-tight leather pants and a very short top, you can’t help but think: ‘Dear God, what is she doing with her life?’
Aha, I suppose you aren’t quite so innocent either.  And it’s okay, everyone does it. But how does it feel when you’re at the other end of the stick?  You can pray that no one comments on how weird your hair seems to look one day, or spend countless hours on your outfit so that someone will notice it.  Some people waltz around in designer clothing every day so that they can ‘fit in.’ Unfortunately for them, robots aren’t exactly normal.  Dress for yourself, not the next photo shoot.  So how does a person dress decently while still keeping their own personal flair?  I may not be an expert, but I think that I could give you a few tips. 

  • Your clothing should cover everything that it intends to at all times–I see it every dayBoys, let’s get real.  We are not in a gangster rap video, nor is it that difficult to acquire a belt these days.  It’s not that I don’t like seeing your underwear on a daily basis… No actually, it is that.  Pull your pants up. I can’t believe that the world has come to a place where a person’s belt is even looser than their pants.  On the other hand, make sure your pants are long enough as well. I don’t want to look down and see the reindeer socks that your mom got you last Christmas.  Girls, please don’t believe that you’re not involved in this.  Tops are way too short, low cut, and see through.  Shorts are way too short.  I’m not saying you can’t flaunt what you have, just don’t go overboard.
  • If you’re going to be gaudy, don’t do it during school or at work – When I walked into school today, I noticed a boy that was strolling along wearing an oversized button down shirt that looked like it was made out of green, gold, and purple wrapping paper.  He shimmered when he walked into the light.  I kind of thought that I had walked into a Mardi Gras party.  I understand that every once in a while we like to shake things up and all, but don’t do it during school or at work [unless of course, it’s Halloween or some really huge event in which dressing up is the norm.]  You can do it if you’d like, just be aware that you will be hit by a tidal wave of strange looks and rude nicknames for the entire day.
  • Make sure everything is the correct size for your body – This is very huge in my opinion [no pun intended.] Try on your clothes before you buy them guys, it only takes a few minutes and works wonders.  Walking around in a ridiculously large shirt and pants kind of makes you look like Aladdin.  I’m not sure why, but that’s what pops into my head when I see it. The same goes for skin-tight clothes. Spandex is a little too 1980’s.
  • If you have holes, sew them up – I can’t stress it enough.  Jeans that have holes in them when you buy them are okay in most cases. But if you’re going to take your own jeans and tear them from your knees to your ankles, that’s taking it too far.  If you want to show off your legs, wear shorts.  Stop looking like you’ve just stepped out of a saw mill. It’s just not flattering.

Now I’ll admit, even I have regrettably worn some things that just weren’t right for me.  We all have.  Fortunately for you, I have come along with this handy guide so that you’ll never have to walk out of the house looking like a complete tool ever again.  If you have any tips and tricks for fashion I’d love to hear them, leave a comment below and share your thoughts!

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