This article was inspired by something that happened a few nights ago. I was walking home from school when I saw a shooting star. I’ve never actually seen one before, but it was so dark, and the star was so bright, it was kind of hard to miss! I know you’re meant to wish on a shooting star, so I tried to think of a really good wish (just in case I never saw another one again), but the shooting star had surprised me and I didn’t really have any good wishes on deck, so I wished for the first semi-intelligible thing that came to mind: for the rest of my life to be totally awesome.
As soon as that jumble of words left my mouth, I immediately started thinking of all the ways my wish could backfire and how the phrase “I wish that the rest of my life is totally awesome” could be misinterpreted and taken out of context and turned around to cause me great misery. I internally moaned at myself for not choosing a better wish, or at least wording it better. I could have used this opportunity to secure a bright and wonderful future for myself, but no, I was stupid and just blurted out the first dumb thing to jump into my head and I’d wasted my wish and possibly also earned myself an untimely death or a crippling brain injury. Greeeeeeaaaaaat!
Then I realized that I was standing on the corner of my road, freezing my socks off, panicking over whether some made-up character that grants wishes was going to mess up my wish using some sort of technical loophole involving death, brain damage or unconsciousness. So, I figured, I must be more specific. This is what I came up with as the best wish.
“I wish that the rest of my life is totally awesome, but you can’t shorten my life to accommodate that wish. Also, not because I’m brain-damaged or something – objectively awesome. And don’t try to cheat me by sneaking in a long coma… I want to be totally conscious of how awesome my life is.”
Always be specific. Just in case the Wish Genie is a total idiot.
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